With this last breathe of intellectual energy, I think it would be worthwhile to record the simple events of a simply, profoundly, wonderful Saturday.
As has been the habit of the last few weeks, I sleepily look at my clock after the second round of bells attempt to wake me up (post-snooze button.) I argue myself out of my soft, warm bed and into some loose, warm clothing.
I know I will regret it if I don't go.
This is the always the wining thought.
Today I decide it is cold enough to opt for driving the half mile or so to the Kauffman residence.
I arrive just in time for the blessing, as me and the other early-arriver's bow our heads and Isaiah leads us in prayer. Seating myself next to the thrice "retired" Rev. Al Lutz, I am immediately greeted with by Mary Kauffman with a plate piled high with steaming blueberry pancakes and bacon. Orange juice and hot tea garnish the feast, and I am soon joined across the table by Sam, and next to me by Brian. The conversations are always more filling than the pancakes (a hard battle) and today is no exception.
Somewhere in the midst of said conversation I am happily recruited to an after-breakfast leaf-raking party at the Lutz/Schmidt residence.
Warm and full, me and my fellow students gratefully clear the tables and chairs. We blow out the candles and load the dishes, piling the tablecloths in the laundrey room and folding up the extra tables; we know the routine.
Sam, Jared and I climb into the car, picking up Heidi at the corner as well. A quick swap of Heidi for Josh at the apartments, and a changing for me into more a more raking-friendly sweatshirt and wool socks, and we are off to the house.
I have never raked such deep leaves before. In the middle of the woods on top of the mountain, we are soon thigh deep in pools of reds and yellows. With more people than rakes, we scoop the piles onto blue tarps, drag them to the cliff behind the house, and toss the leaves over the ten foot bluff into the woods below.
I have never raked so many leaves before; I have also never finished a raking job so quickly before! The 15 or so of us manage countless tarp-fulls in no time, with Al running the leaf blower and wife Julie demonstrating how to unshell hickory nuts. In keeping with the years, Will and a few others jump off the cliff and into the ocean of leafs below. They dig around unsuccessfully for Sam's hat, apparently lost during the same stunt the previous year.
Somehow I manage to become some kind of mediator between siblings Brian and Kelly as they begin a rake-fight.
Soon we are gathered outside around the bratwursts, cookies, and chips prepared by Aunt Collyn Schmidt, heads bowed once again in grateful awe of our Creator.
Alicia sweetly prepares a London Fog for me, and I help her pass out the rest of the hot drinks around the fire inside the house, as the conversation turns to deep-sea life and Pterodactyls in the Congo.
As everyone slowly trickles out, to pursue other Saturday demands, Alicia invites me to study in the house that afternoon, although she will need to be on campus. I heartily accept the invitation, and escape for an hour or so back to the apartment and campus to change and gather supplies.
The afternoon is spent fruitfully at the feet of the aforementioned fire, with Aunt Collyn napping in her room, or reading her bible in the corner, while I am finally able to relax and focus on my work.
By God's grace I finally feel as though I am exactly where I am supposed to be, doing precisly what I am supposed to be doing, and am undaunted for a time by the worries of life as we know it.
Monday, November 24, 2008
Saturday, November 01, 2008
Just an Ordinary Day
On the gravel path that leads down from the main campus to my apartment, a blue mechanical pencil quietly found me walking back. Waiting for me on the edge of the path, it stopped me with a soft-spoken whisper of God's constant and and perfectly-timed provision for me.
"Remember the last time you found a pencil on the ground? You had just run out of all of your other pencils, and were on your way to class. It, too, was unbroken and full of lead.
"Perhaps you hadn't given it much thought, but that pencil is almost out of lead."
--- --- ---
Having hit the wall that night as far as homework was concerned, I headed out of the library. The car was parked in the quasi-secret place under the chapel Max had shown me just a few nights before. I veered toward the side door of the chapel, just on a whim, thinking that I would steal a few minutes alone with God in the sanctuary. Upon approaching the door, I was met with the low, guttural sounds of a kind of melodious nature. Curiosity led me in to find three of my friends practicing on the stage.
James is on the drums, pounding out the beats wearing nothing but shorts and athletic socks. Brian;s tall frame leans over the electric bass, his shaggy blond hair curtaining his face dramatically. But Jonathan steals the show rolling back and fourth on the stage, screaming the words to the song and playing his electric guitar.
Post my initial laughter, and their song dedication to me, I settle myself into a seat in the balcony and accomplish some reading to the soundtrack of their talent.
"Remember the last time you found a pencil on the ground? You had just run out of all of your other pencils, and were on your way to class. It, too, was unbroken and full of lead.
"Perhaps you hadn't given it much thought, but that pencil is almost out of lead."
--- --- ---
Having hit the wall that night as far as homework was concerned, I headed out of the library. The car was parked in the quasi-secret place under the chapel Max had shown me just a few nights before. I veered toward the side door of the chapel, just on a whim, thinking that I would steal a few minutes alone with God in the sanctuary. Upon approaching the door, I was met with the low, guttural sounds of a kind of melodious nature. Curiosity led me in to find three of my friends practicing on the stage.
James is on the drums, pounding out the beats wearing nothing but shorts and athletic socks. Brian;s tall frame leans over the electric bass, his shaggy blond hair curtaining his face dramatically. But Jonathan steals the show rolling back and fourth on the stage, screaming the words to the song and playing his electric guitar.
Post my initial laughter, and their song dedication to me, I settle myself into a seat in the balcony and accomplish some reading to the soundtrack of their talent.
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Ben Entwistle
1988-2008
I don't like the phrase R.I.P. I already know that Ben is in peace. In complete joy and free of pain and suffering. He is with Jesus and I will see him again. We don't mourn for him, but rejoice for him. We mourn for ourselves at having lost him so soon. But what are the 60 or 70 years that we must walk this life without our brother Ben compared to the eternity that we know we will spend with him?
Death is such a difficult thing. It isn't a part of the created order. It is the ultimate consequence of our sin. And yet, death has no victory, and has lost it's sting, because now Ben is finally fully alive. He is home. That is Christ's victory. That is our victory with Christ. We need feel no sting of despair because we have not lost Ben. We will be united with him again soon.
Ben's death is a rush of stinging ice water to my face; a reminder to me of what it really means that my life is not my own, but belongs to Christ. And the days and hours he has lent me here are to be used boldly for him, not tucked away safe and unused in caution and comfort. Like the servants who were given coins, I must invest mine boldly and use them.
I've been given, in such a bitter-sweet way, a newfound courage and confirmation to go back to Covenant, despite my fears of getting sick and having another patched-up semester like the last few. Ben's father reminds me that there are no "what ifs," and that God is completely in control, and that he is good, and that he really and truly loves us. He is overflowing with grace and love in our lives.
Death is such a difficult thing. It isn't a part of the created order. It is the ultimate consequence of our sin. And yet, death has no victory, and has lost it's sting, because now Ben is finally fully alive. He is home. That is Christ's victory. That is our victory with Christ. We need feel no sting of despair because we have not lost Ben. We will be united with him again soon.
Ben's death is a rush of stinging ice water to my face; a reminder to me of what it really means that my life is not my own, but belongs to Christ. And the days and hours he has lent me here are to be used boldly for him, not tucked away safe and unused in caution and comfort. Like the servants who were given coins, I must invest mine boldly and use them.
I've been given, in such a bitter-sweet way, a newfound courage and confirmation to go back to Covenant, despite my fears of getting sick and having another patched-up semester like the last few. Ben's father reminds me that there are no "what ifs," and that God is completely in control, and that he is good, and that he really and truly loves us. He is overflowing with grace and love in our lives.
The Earth feels emptier without you in it Ben,
and the sun is shining a little less brightly without your smile to compete with it.
See you soon, brother!
and the sun is shining a little less brightly without your smile to compete with it.
See you soon, brother!
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Ethanol and the Fox and the Hound
This has been a very girly sort of a week for me. And tonight I have continued that tradition by eating Ben & Jerry's Brownie Fudge ice cream straight from the container while watching a classic Disney movie. I haven't seen the Fox and the Hound for years, and now I'm remembering why I used to love this movie.
Except that now I want to cry, since it's the beginning of the movie, and the baby fox's mommy just got killed, and the fox has huge eyes and acts like a sad, skiddish little kitten...
I heard another angle on the ethanol issue at work the other day. Many of our patients are small farmers, or former farmers. The new use of corn-based ethanol has increased the price of corn. Now many farmers cannot afford to buy corn as feed. Other types of feed have also increased in prices. And the outlook is that the prices will just continue to go up.
Another lady, not a farmer, but well educated in world affairs, was saying that, while we will buy less foreign oil with the use of ethanol, we will be importing more corn from overseas. Corn which is a staple food in many other countries, especially third world countries. So it is making it more difficult and expensive for people in the third world to buy food for themselves and their families. And, of course, there is a high chance of underpaying or mistreating workers in foreign countries from whom we export corn.
I'm not saying I'm against the increased use of ethanol, but I think it is important to look at all aspects of the issue.
Ah the complications of life.
Except that now I want to cry, since it's the beginning of the movie, and the baby fox's mommy just got killed, and the fox has huge eyes and acts like a sad, skiddish little kitten...
I heard another angle on the ethanol issue at work the other day. Many of our patients are small farmers, or former farmers. The new use of corn-based ethanol has increased the price of corn. Now many farmers cannot afford to buy corn as feed. Other types of feed have also increased in prices. And the outlook is that the prices will just continue to go up.
Another lady, not a farmer, but well educated in world affairs, was saying that, while we will buy less foreign oil with the use of ethanol, we will be importing more corn from overseas. Corn which is a staple food in many other countries, especially third world countries. So it is making it more difficult and expensive for people in the third world to buy food for themselves and their families. And, of course, there is a high chance of underpaying or mistreating workers in foreign countries from whom we export corn.
I'm not saying I'm against the increased use of ethanol, but I think it is important to look at all aspects of the issue.
Ah the complications of life.
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Blogosphere, oh blogosphere...
I'm wondering if anyone actually reads my little blog here.
Perhaps if I actually posted on it more regularly it might stand a better chance...
Or perhaps not.
None the less, I have enjoyed the blogosphere.
So I went to this meeting the other night about starting an invisible children chapter, or have some local involvement in any case, to raise help and awareness about the situation here in Springfield.
For those of you (my many readers) who do not know what i'm talking about, you should make yourself aware. go to invisiblechildren.com and explore. little do many of us comfortable, middle class americans know, but there has been a bloody civil war going on in the country of Uganda for twenty some years, which has destroyed the lives of countless children who are forced into a rebel army as soldiers, girls who are forced to be child wives of rebel leaders, and men, women, and children who were forced out of their homes and into inhumane displacement camps.
so we were talking about the effect that the organization has made on the issue, and in thinking and talking about it, it was actually quite humbling to think about the impact it has had.
for example: last spring, about a year ago, the organization held a national event, localted in 15 major cities across the us, where thousands of people, especially young people (high school-college age) gathered and reflected a shadow of what life is like in a displacement camp by sleeping in cardboard boxes, eating only saltine crackers and water, and other such things.
we also wrote letters to our senators, urging action in ending this war.
so senators across the US all of a sudden had hundreds of letters hand-delivered to them all reading the same message: we have a responsibility to help end this war.
and they did something about it.
they wrote a letter to president bush and condeliza rice.
eventually president bush appointed a delegate to go over and help negotiate peace between Joseph Koney and the Ugandan government.
Peace is slowly, but surely being negotiated.
A war is ending.
We actually made a difference.
We actually made a difference. A big one.
We helped to end a war. every generation will make mistakes. loads of them. but sometimes it's proud moments way overshadow it's shameful. I hope ours will.
Perhaps if I actually posted on it more regularly it might stand a better chance...
Or perhaps not.
None the less, I have enjoyed the blogosphere.
So I went to this meeting the other night about starting an invisible children chapter, or have some local involvement in any case, to raise help and awareness about the situation here in Springfield.
For those of you (my many readers) who do not know what i'm talking about, you should make yourself aware. go to invisiblechildren.com and explore. little do many of us comfortable, middle class americans know, but there has been a bloody civil war going on in the country of Uganda for twenty some years, which has destroyed the lives of countless children who are forced into a rebel army as soldiers, girls who are forced to be child wives of rebel leaders, and men, women, and children who were forced out of their homes and into inhumane displacement camps.
so we were talking about the effect that the organization has made on the issue, and in thinking and talking about it, it was actually quite humbling to think about the impact it has had.
for example: last spring, about a year ago, the organization held a national event, localted in 15 major cities across the us, where thousands of people, especially young people (high school-college age) gathered and reflected a shadow of what life is like in a displacement camp by sleeping in cardboard boxes, eating only saltine crackers and water, and other such things.
we also wrote letters to our senators, urging action in ending this war.
so senators across the US all of a sudden had hundreds of letters hand-delivered to them all reading the same message: we have a responsibility to help end this war.
and they did something about it.
they wrote a letter to president bush and condeliza rice.
eventually president bush appointed a delegate to go over and help negotiate peace between Joseph Koney and the Ugandan government.
Peace is slowly, but surely being negotiated.
A war is ending.
We actually made a difference.
We actually made a difference. A big one.
We helped to end a war. every generation will make mistakes. loads of them. but sometimes it's proud moments way overshadow it's shameful. I hope ours will.
Thursday, January 24, 2008
My thoughts nowadays.
I know a person isn't supposed to judge a book by it's cover, but I find myself doing just that. Literally. (No pun intended.)
Meandering through the children's section of Borders, my imagination is enraptured by the various pictures of sword fights, princesses, and animals.
Tonight I broke down and bought a book that has appealed to me because of its cover and title for months. A prequel to the Peter Pan story, Peter and the Starcatchers, is the newest addition to my library. Yet another book that I shall start and probably not finish for another three years.
Of course, part of the willingness to splurge on this book was probably brought on by a wonderful dream I had last night in which I was among the lost boys, fighting pirates, swinging by vines between trees to sneak up on bad guys, and defending our territory in the woods.
I've been having a lot of vivid dreams lately, which I owe to my Zoloft. Most of them I've been able to make some sort of sense of. I don't really know where this one could have come from, but it was enjoyable.
And on that topic, I've recently decided to stop trying to suppress my love for children's books, fairly tales, and well, just good stories in general. I'm not sure why I ever tried to deny it, actually. I guess it was just one of those "I'm too old for this, I should read smarter, more respectable books. Time to grow up."
Yeah. I'm glad I don't think like that so much anymore.
Meandering through the children's section of Borders, my imagination is enraptured by the various pictures of sword fights, princesses, and animals.
Tonight I broke down and bought a book that has appealed to me because of its cover and title for months. A prequel to the Peter Pan story, Peter and the Starcatchers, is the newest addition to my library. Yet another book that I shall start and probably not finish for another three years.
Of course, part of the willingness to splurge on this book was probably brought on by a wonderful dream I had last night in which I was among the lost boys, fighting pirates, swinging by vines between trees to sneak up on bad guys, and defending our territory in the woods.
I've been having a lot of vivid dreams lately, which I owe to my Zoloft. Most of them I've been able to make some sort of sense of. I don't really know where this one could have come from, but it was enjoyable.
And on that topic, I've recently decided to stop trying to suppress my love for children's books, fairly tales, and well, just good stories in general. I'm not sure why I ever tried to deny it, actually. I guess it was just one of those "I'm too old for this, I should read smarter, more respectable books. Time to grow up."
Yeah. I'm glad I don't think like that so much anymore.
Monday, October 29, 2007
What the heck, it's 3 AM and I can't sleep
IF YOUR LIFE WAS A MOVIE, WHAT WOULD THE SOUNDTRACK BE?
So, here's how it works:
1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that's playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button
6. Don't lie and try to pretend you’re cool...
Opening Credits:
Jigsaw Falling Into Place- Radiohead
Waking Up:
You're Still You- Josh Groban
First Day At School:
Sum Of Beautiful- Charlie Hall
Falling In Love:
Bittersweet- James Taylor
Fight Song:
Track 27- Shroeder's Greatest Hits
Breaking Up:
Have yourself a merry little Christmas- Frank Sinatra
Prom:
To Where you are- Josh Groban
Proposal:
Here I am- Michael W. Smith
Life:
Wake Up- Arcade Fire
Mental Breakdown:
Be Thou My Vision- Michael Card
Driving:
Beautiful Sound- Newsboys
Flashback:
Paperthin Hymn- Anberlin
Getting back together:
In Love with the 80's (Pink Tux)- Relient K
Wedding:
Voice of Truth- Casting Crowns
Birth of Child:
You are a Child of mine- Mark Shultz (no joke)
Final Battle:
Dizzy- Goo Goo Dolls
Death Scene:
Not What You See- Kutless
Funeral:
Keep the Car Running- Arcade Fire
End Credits:
Bus Driver- Caedmon's Call
So, here's how it works:
1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that's playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button
6. Don't lie and try to pretend you’re cool...
Opening Credits:
Jigsaw Falling Into Place- Radiohead
Waking Up:
You're Still You- Josh Groban
First Day At School:
Sum Of Beautiful- Charlie Hall
Falling In Love:
Bittersweet- James Taylor
Fight Song:
Track 27- Shroeder's Greatest Hits
Breaking Up:
Have yourself a merry little Christmas- Frank Sinatra
Prom:
To Where you are- Josh Groban
Proposal:
Here I am- Michael W. Smith
Life:
Wake Up- Arcade Fire
Mental Breakdown:
Be Thou My Vision- Michael Card
Driving:
Beautiful Sound- Newsboys
Flashback:
Paperthin Hymn- Anberlin
Getting back together:
In Love with the 80's (Pink Tux)- Relient K
Wedding:
Voice of Truth- Casting Crowns
Birth of Child:
You are a Child of mine- Mark Shultz (no joke)
Final Battle:
Dizzy- Goo Goo Dolls
Death Scene:
Not What You See- Kutless
Funeral:
Keep the Car Running- Arcade Fire
End Credits:
Bus Driver- Caedmon's Call
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