Monday, August 22, 2005

Looking back


Looking back at the road so far
The journey’s left its share of scars
Mostly from leaving the narrow and straight
Looking back it’s clear to me
That a man is more than the sum of his deeds
And how you’ve made good of this mess I’ve made
Is a profound mystery
Looking back you know
You had to bring me through
All that I was so afraid of
Though I questioned the sky,
now I see why
I had to walk the rocks to see the mountain view
Looking back I see the lead of love
Looking back I can finally see
How failures bring humility
(I’d rather have wisdom and pain)
Brings me to my knees
(Than be a comfortable old fool)
Helps me see my need for Thee
Looking back you know
You had to bring me through
All that I was so afraid of
Though I questioned the sky,
now I see why
I had to walk the rocks to see the mountain view
Looking back I see the lead of love
These are the lyrics for Caedmons Call's song Lead of Love. I heard this song for the first time recently and, like Jars of Clay's Love Song for a Savior (which is a whole entry in itself,) this song is a piercingly accurate representation of my life over the last couple of years. people who know me know some of the struggles i have gone through since starting high school. now, looking back, i am starting to see God's wonderful plan unfolding in my life in ways that could never have been part of my own design. The line that especially reaches me is in bold; "I had to walk the rocks to see the mountain view." if God had not brought me through all of the struggles in my life, and did not still, i would not be nearly as close to him. and through my struggles He is strengthening my faith, to know that He is preparing me for His service and to bring Him more and more glory in my life. I now have a joy in Him that could only be a result of, among other things, seeing His handiwork in my life. Now i want to boast in my trials, if only that others might see His grace working in me. Like Jars of Clay sings in their song Art in Me,
In your picture book I'm trying hard to see
Turning endless pages of this tragedy
Sculpting every move you compose a symphony
You plead to everyone, "see the art in me"
It is also ironic that the song would speak of seeing the mountain view, since, God willing, after the struggle of getting through high school i will go to Covenant College, which is situated on a mountain.
My "mountain view," to be seen in God's time, after walking many rocks

7 comments:

Unknown said...

wow, like what you have to say and am so glad that you have such a strong relationship with God. Good luck with your struggles in life and college coming soon. You have come far and are brave, so glad to have met you! see you at school and never loose track of your Savor. I am so glad to learn about blogger. it is quite fun to share fellowship and gives me and hopefully others joy! Thank you cellochick

KatzeMeg said...

BLOGS ROCK!!! thanks Charlie, that means a lot to me. and i'm glad the blogging disease is spreading. it gives great oportunities for discussion.

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Angie said...

Meghan it's good to have you posting again!
I love the song, do you have it on cd or anything so we can hear it? See ya tomorrow!

KatzeMeg said...

i sure do have it on CD! it's on one of the Cd's that Joel made for the STEPers.

KatzeMeg said...

AAAAAAAAA!!! i just deleted your post angela!!!! i must try and retrieve it!!!

CelloChic said...

Hey, it's late and I can't sleep.
So I'm on your blog. Okay, I wrote my will, now you need to write yours. Be sure to tell people that you're joking so you don't get people misunderstanding you. Maybe my gravestone was a bit somber for some...